Me & My Beast
by DragonMasterPaarthurnax
Summary: Bonnie has always lived under the influence of an inner madness that desires blood every night, much like her fellow animatronics. Unlike them she finds it unbearable to carry that load, it torments her every night. Follow her as she struggles to break free from those shackles, develop and form a new life without influence from the beast inside.


Me & My Beast

* * *

I don't know what I am. Or why I do what I do, but I know that it's a part of me. My urge that always rests somewhere deep down within me. I've tried so desperately to break my chains but to no avail. The others have told me to just give up and embrace it like they do. But I just can't. The thought of being completely submerged by an endless stream of darkness and being unable to control my actions, frightens me more than anything else. I will never, even if it causes me pain stay in this limbo forever. Then that night came.

That night was a special one. We had been left alone for countless years without even the breath of a human attendance. I had been lying on the floor for so long that the passing of time was a blur to me. I had been staring at the main stage of large lunch room at the center of the abandoned building. A layer of fine dust painted my body and the room. A mess of chairs spread across the room, having fallen over at some point. The posters that were along the walls were exfoliated and moist. The only locals were barren, cold, and empty as usual. This night though someone appeared, bringing life with it.

Over the sound of rain thumping against the roof, I could hear the faint sound of footsteps. I had no clue what it was or if my mind was playing tricks on me. I was unsure if I was even if able to move at all. As the sound continued closing in, I tried to lift my face from the tile floor, my head being filled with the thoughts of a human. Though the simple act felt impossible as my limbs couldn't move due to the rust that had plagued them for countless years. With all my my willpower I tried to move them again, a soft scraping sound echoing forth as they loosened. The steps grew closer, overpowering all other noises in the building. As I managed to open my eyes properly, my vision came in blurry and cut strangely small on one side. My focus quickly changed as I remember the sound, giving me no choice but to try to to stand up. With much struggling, I tried getting to my legs that could barely bear my weight and squeaked with strain. As I rose from the ground they shook and swayed threatening to give any second. As I tried to balance against the wall next to me, I felt myself slip before I collapsed and slammed my body against the wall. With a ringing crash I slide back down to the floor causing a cloud of broken ceramic tiles and dust. A few extra scratches covered my body now, but it just added to my collecting which I could care less about. The being must have heard me because their step quickened as they approached me. I managed to turn my head and could spot see a beam of light flooding from a corridor, blinding me as it got closer. I tried to make a noise, anything, but my vocal chords just made a garbled mess. I was hoping it would make him turn around and realize what he was doing. Seeing it not working, I grabbed ahold of a table and used it to pull myself upwards. With this second attempt I was more successful and stood up, managing to find my balance. At that moment someone entered the room with their flashlight shining right in my eyes. It was then that I suddenly couldn't see anything. But not because of brightness, but due to darkness.

The darkness took me in and instant. I barely remember much of what exactly happened during those minutes. All I know is that the rage from my murderous urges took over. After all these years of loneliness and waiting, I couldn't resist the urge when I saw the human. The feelings I hated to the core filled my entire being, any struggle being in vain. I forced my body into submission, suppressed my sanity, thoughts, willpower only to let the space be filled with a monstrous beast with a darkness I couldn't understand. All my desires were replaced by one, the want to kill. I had to cause everyone and everything as much pain as possible. I had become what I feared the most, my inner self. Perhaps it was a demon? Maybe it was my true nature? I had questions but would never receive an answer. Not even the others could give me an answer since they made it seem as if they were just as in the dark as me. That or don't want to at least tell me the truth. Even so they would always taunt me for my belief that there was a way to break those shackles. I was told that I must embrace it and learn to enjoy it. To them there was no other way to cope with it. They say that it's impossible to resist and this time they were right. I couldn't bring myself back together enough to even start thinking of list of ways to fight back the urges. As the humans full form entered my field of vision, everything went completely dark.

A loud bang crashed through the corridor as a table was thrown over. Quentin eyes were deeply coated with fear as he hide behind a pile of rusty chairs. He was a young man in the early twenties with brown hair, blue eyes, and security uniform that was now covered in dust. He had a nighttime job where he worked for a security company and spent his time driving from different buildings to "inspect & protect" as the company motto was. Even with those words, along with the practices and studies he had nothing could have prepared him for this. The animatronic, representing an oversized blue bunny, continued its search for him and kicked the next table over with a wail. More debris and dust covered the already dirty floor. Quentin was thankful for the animatronic's bad shape, as its rusty limbs made it impossible for it to move at any greater speed and the broken eye didn't help in its cause to find him.

He already deeply regretted the decision to walk into the abandoned building. It should have just been a quick in and out to check that no homeless people were living here, before giving an all clear to the demolition crew. _Will they find my mangled body tomorrow?_ Sweat ran down his forehead as possible scenarios flew through his head. _And even if I avoid death, how do I explain this to the security company?_ Questions banged around in his head as he returned to reality. The animatronic was slowly tramping away from his location, after smashing another table in half. He quickly glanced up over chairs to take in the scene around him. He quickly noticed three other animatronics standing, unmoved. Each had years of wear and tear just like their friend.

As Quentin saw this, he made his decision and quickly dashed for the closest doorway. He heard no noise behind him as he turned around the corner and pushed his back against it. The low beamed emergency lightning he had turned on as he had came in was just enough to let him navigate, yet creating an eerie atmosphere. He considered the option to use his flashlight but figured that it would draw unwanted attention.

With great care and his ears listening for any sound, he moved through the corridor. As he moved forward, he stepped on some broken glass, followed by a noise a sudden noise echoing from down the corridor. As Quentin swallowed he could hear in the distance the thudding of approaching footsteps. Within an instant he could see how a shape rise at the end of the corridor. From the green faint glow from one eye he could tell it was the same one he'd seen earlier. It tilted its head as it started walking towards him, its mouth opened as a rasping voice spoke with a prerecorded message.

"Be careful… careful when touching the animatronics! Getting caught in… in any wiring or machinery may cause… cause serious injury,"

Quentin felt his heartbeat pick up speed as his fear grew.

"St-stop, I'm obliged to.. to inspect this building.. uh."

The animatronic didn't seem to take any notice of his words and continued forward. His hands trembled as he reached for his duty belt where he felt the comfortable grip of his gun.

"I, I'm warning you."

As the creature came rushing down the corridor Quentin took aim at its face. With shaky hands he squeezed the trigger and the gun recoiled sending a bullet flying down the corridor. The sound of metal against metal echoed through the building as the bullet penetrated the animatronic followed by a stream of bluish black liquid to gush from its shoulder. A loud crackling sounds emitted from its mouth and it fell down on one knee. Quentin wasted no time and turn heel, running into the trashed main hall. He ran up the main stage and through another corridor. As he ran a door caught his eyes with the words emergency exit above them.

"Couldn't have been better," he thought as he threw himself against the door and pushed on the green bar along it. The door flew open and the darkness of the cold night met him. Quickly closing the door behind himself, as he started running towards his van. _I'm never going back there. Just tell the demolition company that it's ready for being blown up. Those nightmare fueled things can not be considered worth saving._

Quentin turned around the corner to a back part of the building's parking lot that had brick walls surrounding it and only leaving enough space for about two cars. As his eyes spotted the company van, the panic within him started to calm down. As he headed to the vehicle, he threw a side glance at the two pairs of double glass doors leading into the back of the pizzeria. He gave a sigh of relief as nothing seemed to move or even seem out of place with the dimness of the yellow lights in the parking lot. As he got to the van he opened his door and lifted his keys to the ignition when a familiar sound in the distance met his ears. The wailing of sirens echo through the night and a few seconds later a patrol car pulled up. The car's brakes screeched as it stopped right in the opening to the parking lot. As the car stopped, the driver door opened, a lone officer stepped out. Quentin quickly realized the errors of his actions as reality struck him.

_Shooting a gun in the middle of the city. What did I think would happen?_ A lump built its way in Quentin's throat as he saw the officer run across towards the pizzeria and up a set of steps to the doors. He immediately tried to opening them, Quentin realizing that the front door was still open. _Are they able to slip out? I gotta warn that officer. He's going to..._ Without finishing his thought Quentin rushed out of the van and shouted.

"Officer, you can't go in there, it's dangero-,"

He was cut off as a roar drowned out his words. The blue creature from earlier emerged from the shadows and charged at the officer who had the door partly open. Not stopping the creature crushed the glass door and tackled him down the stairs, where both of them tumbling down the concrete steps in a rain of shattered glass. The officer screeched in pain as he got pinned under the robots body weight. Desperately, he flailed his body around trying to escape its grip as it slowly opened its mouth and closed in on his face.

"Please, no, no, please," he screamed at the top of his lungs, his face turning pale. Quentin reached for his service weapon a second time. 'It worked earlier so why not now?,' he thought as he pulled it out, taking aim at the beast over the struggling policeman. He breathed slowly, as the police man managed to smack the animatronic over the face, halting it for a short moment. Quentin pulled the trigger, the muzzle lighting up and a bang echoing all over the parking lot as the bullet made its way towards its target. The animatronic's head was violently thrown to the side with a clank. The liquid that covered its shoulder started leaking out from its face and all over the officer. The earlier glowing eyes went dark, as it tipped over on its side and went quiet. Quentin with his gun still aimed at it started to take slow steps towards the officer. As Quentin came closer he holstered the gun and bent down to the officer.

"Man, are you okay?"

The officer just breathed heavily and nodded. He had a white tone over his face along with countless cuts from glass shards across his body, some of them bleeding. His upper chest was drenched in liquid from the animatronic and his leg was twisted in an awkward angle due to the fall. He laid an arm around Quentin's shoulders and tried to stand up but his legs folded under him.

"Damn it," the officer cursed. The pale officer fell down in a lump and didn't even try to get back up instead his eyes went blank, falling into unconsciousness. _Is it from the pain of the wounds? Or just pure shock? I need to get him out of here before the rest of those creatures appears._ Quentin started to reach around the belt of the officer and found his communication radio only to be met with disappointment as he realized that it had been crushed during the fight. He sprinted over to his car and search around for a medic kit before returning to the injured officer. When he came back he rolled up the pants on the officer and looked at his leg. Along the thigh, there was a large blue bruises but nothing seemed to be broken. Also none of the cuts from the glass seemed to be serious, but they could get infected if not treated properly. Quentin felt a cold chill in the air. When he looked up he realized his mistake. Before he could pull his gun out a strong hand reached around his throat and he was lifted off the ground.

Two magenta eyes pierced him as he looked right into the face of a yellow chicken. The yellow color had a much darker tone than the original due to years of dirt and dust covering it. The beak was cracked in one corner of the mouth and it emitted a loud crackling sound that was impossible to decipher before falling back to silence. Quentin tried to scream but the grip around his throat made it impossible. He flailed and tried to reach for his gun, but he felt how the chicken gripped it as soon as he managed to get it out of the holster. It tilted its head and looked at him as it forced it out of his hand and threw it aside.

"….Causing… ing damage to the… the animatronics… prohibited. The company…. file.. file a lawsuit," After the prerecorded message ended it dropped him on the ground. He took a deep breath and started to fill his lungs with air and look around for the gun. As soon as he saw it, he suddenly felt the chicken grab him by the leg and start dragging him away from it, back inside the pizzeria.

I don't know what had happened. I woke up outside, in the rain. My head was dizzy and vision blurry. I couldn't move again and just laid there on the dirty ground. I noticed that I was surrounded by broken glass and a puddle of black liquid. It was forming a large puddle and spewing from my body as well. The pain was unbearable. It felt like someone had ripped me in pieces. It was like the pain I felt when the beast took over but the biggest difference was that the pain ended when my consciousness lost grip on reality. This pain didn't end. No matter how many I noises I made, how much I tried to move my body away from it, nothing happened. I tried to understand what caused it, but couldn't remember anything, just brief glimpses of me approaching the night guard in a corridor and then pushing someone on the ground. For once I would have welcomed to be lost to my madness.

I remembered that people had tried to hurt me when we broke into the security office when the pizzeria still was open. During the days the kids played, during the night it was our play time. When it was night our urges slowly started to grow stronger and stronger, especially in the presence of a human. So the few times a security guard actually stayed over for the night they were in for a surprise. Few lived to tell the tale. What hit me during that moment, was that even when a guard hit me over the head with a baton, I felt nothing, until the beast eventually left me. But as I laid on the grounds, being tortured by pain it had hidden itself somewhere deep inside me, leaving me to my own demise. It felt so unfair since it was the cause of all of this. The pain made me wonder how the humans felt when we attacked them. When under the influence of the beast, I am barely able to remember what I do, the many pain filled and wretched faces quickly became dull. I don't even know the names of most of the ones I kill. Just flashes of their pathetic begging, frozen faces. Only in moments of clarity, do I wonder what I'm doing and why. Was it only a constant hunt through the nights. Sneaking around corners, avoiding cameras and tricking humans into put focus on the wrong person. When the beast has only taken over partly, controlling our desires, but not our sanity. It's essentially a time of internal torture and fear for the human, which the beast enjoyed to the fullest. Then once we finally caught him, that's when the beast takes us completely. Everything that can be called human about us is gone and the real torture begins. Short glimpses of me crushing skulls, breaking legs, and impaling their bodies with my teeth. That's mostly all I remember after a night. Then waking up the next day, realizing that it had all happened again. Finding myself drenched in blood and remorse. Being forced by the others to help clean up the mangled body, sometimes spread out in pieces, making me face head on what I've become. As I would clean away every trace of the incident, I desperately tried to piece myself back together on through the next day. That's my part of the torture. I'm stuck in an endless cycle of torture. While a human has a clear end to their suffering and getting relief from it. The only way out is that of the others that can accept their fate and fall so deep into the darkness that so they can enjoy it.

I was forced back to reality when I heard a moaning sound. While still cringing in pain I managed to turn over on my other side. The pain faded away as my inner demon woke up. I saw him. I don't know if it was the human from earlier or someone else but he was not far away. He was crawling along the ground with a trail of blood dripping behind him and covering the hand on his thigh. Whenever his thigh touched the ground he made winced and stopped moving. He kept his eyes on a police vehicle that was parked a few meters away. At that moment I immediately regretted my earlier wish for going into a frenzy again. I preferred any pain over that. I tried to look away and concentrate on the pain to keep me in touch with reality, but my defense quickly weakened by the sight of the injured human. It was an easy target, after all this time waiting I couldn't let it away. The pain died away, and only a single thought filled my mind. Killing the human. Despite my injuries and the chance of making it worse the beast inside me forced me to start crawling along the ground just like him and to take up the hunt. He was they prey and I was the beast.

* * *

**Author Note**

This was a little project I picked up because I enjoyed writing something that I would get a chance to publish. I'm rather new to the Fnaf community so I've decided to make a story that will deviate from the lore quite a lot sometimes because keeping track of everything has been... complicated. If you're into Fnaf you know what I mean. Have fun reading!

I'm currently searching for people that are willingly to help me with reviewing my works so I can improve. If you're interested leave a review or PM me.

For those who reads my other stories: I'm currently working on a chapter there as well. I'll try to get some writing done whenever I got a moment to spare.

At last credit to my beta reader for helping me spell & grammar check my works.

\- DragonMasterPaarthurnax


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